


Don't Spam The GC

by imlafayetti



Category: EXO (Band), GOT7, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Crack, M/M, basically got7 wants to team up with bts, in text form, most likely short chapters, to eventually hack into exo's group chat
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-17
Updated: 2017-03-21
Packaged: 2018-09-25 05:15:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 5,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9804107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imlafayetti/pseuds/imlafayetti
Summary: loohan: who the hell is "lumybias"?





	1. Where Are Jungkook's Shoes?

**Author's Note:**

> there might be spanish in this and the translations will be added at the end of the chapters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jungshook: somebody stole my timberlands
> 
> richeommajin: okay we are not leaving this house until jungkook gets his shoes
> 
> jungshook: thanks eomma
> 
> daddynamjoon: if somebody doesn't confess right now im about to fight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i honestly have no idea what it is happening in this chapter

jungshook: hve you guys seen my timberlands??

daddynamjoon: have**

daddynamjoon: we all have some maybe somebody accidentally put yours on

jungshook: but i wanted to wear them

daddynamjoon: just put on somebody elses

jungshook: but i want to wear mine

daddynamjoon: jin help

jungshook: hyung, who would do such a thing?

richeommajin: what's going on?

jungshook: somebody stole my timberlands

richeommajin: okay we are not leaving this house until jungkook gets his shoes

jungshook: thanks eomma

daddynamjoon: if somebody doesn't confess right now im about to fight

richeommajin: kim namjoon

daddynamjoon: fly** stupid autocorrect

daddynamjoon: we’re gonna fly, fly~ neol ango naragabollae neon nawa hamkke gajullae girl  
we’re gonna fly, fly~ neowa naui kkumeun yeogie nae gaseume dasi hwalhwal ta girl  
fly fly~ uri siganeun machi sonagiwataeyangi gyocha doeneun il  
fly fly~ teoneoreul beoseo nal ttae jjeum hwanhage neol bichwo juneun il

richeommajin: namjoon what the hell

sugayoongi: i don't have them

ihavejams: me too

daddynamjoon: jimin...

ihavejams: ...

ihavenojams: ...

daddynamjoon: there we go

richeommajin: maybe hoseok has them...

imyourhope: what do i have?

daddynamjoon: jimin's jams

richeommajin: i won't tolerate bullying

daddynamjoon: you're no fun

vtae: omg they're in my room remember?

jungshook: oh yea...

jungshook: heh

daddynamjoon: jeon jungkook...

jungshook: !!!

daddynamjoon: you best sleep with one eye open tonight

richeommajin: the movie starts in thirty minutes hurry up guys

ihavenojams: did you just assume my gender?

richeommajin: park jimin!

ihavenojams: okay im ready

richeommajin: that's what i thought.


	2. A Mi Me Gusta Comer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dabqueen: guys im pregnant 
> 
> dabeomma: i told jackson to use protection
> 
> dabqueen: what
> 
> dabeomma: what

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there is spanish in this chapter so the translations will be at the end of it

dabprince: im tired

dabking: that's what you get for watching that m-drama all last night

dabprince: i needed to know is zifeng found out that yanuo was a girl!

dabmaknae: did he?

dabprince: watch it to find out

dabmaknae: fine

dabeomma: dabbing is old now 

dabeomma: why don't we change our usernames?

dabprince: ...

dabmaknae: which drama is it?

dabprince: bromance and yes its on netflix

dabmaknae: okay

dabjae: im hungry

dabpapi: guys im learning spanish

dabpapi: it's actually kind of easy

dabpapi: hola mi nombre es jaebum. cómo estás? estoy nervioso. qué te gusta? a mi me gusta comer. 

dabeomma: what the hell?

dabprince: im confused

dabjae: somebody make me some food

dabpapi: okay what do you want?

dabjae: hm

dabjae: whatever you make 

dabpapi: okay im making ramen because im feeling lazy

dabjae: spicy ramen pls

dabpapi: any objections?

dabpapi: okay too late

dabeomma: he ain't ever like that with me tho

dabking: yeah because you do everything for yourself

dabprince: ^

dabjae: ^

dabqueen: guys im pregnant 

dabeomma: i told jackson to use protection

dabqueen: what

dabeomma: what

dabqueen: no i made myself pregnant

dabqueen: i look so hot rn

dabqueen: fuck

dabprince: damn that visual

dabjae: im pregnant

dabeomma: i don't wanna know what's happening right now

dabpapi: i leave to make food and this happens

dabking: i wanna see

dabking: i heard you say don't let jackson inside

dabking: r00d

dabqueen: stop texting

dabking: i thought you cared about me

dabking: wow

dabqueen: im muting 

dabking: w

dabking: o

dabking: w

dabpapi: youngjae come get your food

dabjae: thanks dad

dabqueen: *picture*

dabeomma: why do i have such good looking friends??

dabpapi: ^

dabking: ^

dabmaknae: this drama is confusing bammie

dabmaknae: if the secret that yanuo is a girl gets out before she's 26 she'll die?

dabprince: its not confusing if you just said it

dabmaknae: i hate you so much. 

daddynamjoon was added to the chat

dabking: i have a great idea rapmon

daddynamjoon: what?

dabking: lets hack into exo hyung's group chat

dabprince: yooooooooooooooooo

daddynamjoon: how?

dabprince: make separate accounts and hack in i guess

dabking: ^

dabeomma: if we're all doing this lets all claim a username

dabprince: i want stanjongdaddy

dabeomma: omg

dabpapi: if the china line is still there i want lumybias

daddynamjoon: do you want me to tell the rest of my group

dabking: add us

daddynamjoon: okay brb

dabjae: what the hell is going on?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hola mi nombre es jaebum. cómo estás? estoy nervioso. qué te gusta? a mi me gusta comer. - hello my name is jaebum. how are you? i am nervous. what do you like? i like to eat. 
> 
> i don't know why i said that lol
> 
> oh and there might be a double update today.


	3. StanJongDaddy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jungshook: mommy killed my bias ﾐ　'_＞｀）
> 
> dabprince: i thought i was your bias??
> 
> jungshook: ...
> 
> dabprince: ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stan jongdaddy dudes

dabking was added to the chat

dabprince was added to the chat

dabjae was added to the chat

dabpapi was added to the chat

dabqueen was added to the chat

dabeomma was added to the chat

dabmaknae was added to the chat

vtae: who did that

richeommajin: probably jungkook

jungshook: why is it always my fault?

richeommajin: because you always add strangers to our group chats

daddynamjoon: actually it was me

richeommajin: why?

daddynamjoon: jackson asked if we wanted to hack into exo's group chat so i said yes

richeommajin: omg i've been wanting to do this

vtae: i should've suspected they were got7 since they all have dab in their name

ihavenojams: but you're dumb

vtae: like you should be talking

ihavenojams: ﾐ　'_＞｀）

richeommajin: ew it's only cute when jungkook does it

jungshook: ^~^

dabeomma: another mom?

richeommajin: oh my gosh another mom just like me

dabeomma: :)

dabpapi: oh no

richeommajin: do you buy face masks?

dabeomma: yes how else am i supposed to have my face this flawless?

richeommajin: are you in seoul?

dabeomma: yes

dabprince: what the hell is happening?

dabqueen: bambam shut up

richeommajin: wanna go shopping?

dabeomma: omg yes

dabeomma: i'll pick you up?

richeommajin: dm me your number

dabeomma: okay

dabeomma: see kids? somebody enjoys shopping for face masks for 20 hours

richeommajin: my kids hate shopping with me

dabeomma: omg same

richeommajin: don't text and drive!

dabeomma: i make no promises

richeommajin: and that was the last we've heard of jinyoung

jungshook: mommy killed my bias ﾐ　'_＞｀）

dabprince: i thought i was your bias??

jungshook: ...

dabprince: ...

dabking: and that was how jungkook and bambam stopped talking forever

dabprince: shut up jackson!

dabqueen: finally somebody says it

dabking: shut up mark!

dabqueen: r00d

dabqueen: wth do i do with these kids now?

dabprince: yay mark is in charge

daddynamjoon: okay so everyone knows we're making another username so everyone choose yours

daddynamjoon: bambam called stanjongdaddy and jaebum called lumybias

daddynamjoon: im stanbts

jungshook: omg ur dumb

jungshook: i want standaddykim

dabeomma: stangot7

dabprince: i hate you all

dabqueen: i want kimminsock

dabking: i want papisewhoe

dabqueen: what the f-hell

sugadaddie: i want sugapapi

daddynamjoon: don't add ur name

sugadaddie: jongdaepapi

ihavejams: stanbyunbaekhyun

daddynamjoon: jimin...

ihavejams: ...

ihavenojams: ...

dabprince: hahahahahhahahaha omg

richeommajin: this happens every day omg

richeommajin: richeommasuho

dabmaknae: ohsehun

dabprince: aw he's so innocent protect him 

dabmaknae: ...

dabjae: shooksoo

daddynamjoon: okay then were set

vtae: stankimtae

imyourhope: gottaluhan

dabpapi: too soon ^

dabprince: okay im going to watch a movie bye

dabmaknae: im joining you

dabprince: okay 

daddynamjoon: jin

richeommajin: yes

daddynamjoon: can you buy some candy

richeommajin: does it look like im made of money?

daddynamjoon: richeommajin

richeommajin: ...

richeommajin: fine but you owe me

daddynamjoon: whatever you want

richeommajin: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

daddynamjoon: oh boy

imyourhope: okay im warning everyone to sleep early

jungshook: why

imyourhope: because

jungshook: ur weird

sugadaddie: okay but im actually going to sleep right now goodnight y'all

imyourhope: okay me too

jungshook: does hoseok hyung sleep with yoongi hyung?

ihavenojams: idk 

vtae: wanna go find out?

jungshook: yes!

ihavenojams: lets go!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i gotta go to sleep early for the not today mv but im probably gonna be up at 03am whoops


	4. I Have No Jams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ihavejams: i don't hate you hoseok :)
> 
> daddynamjoon: park jimin...
> 
> ihavejams: ...
> 
> imyourhope: shut up jimin nobody likes you
> 
> ihavenojams: ...

jungshook: are we hacking today?

daddynamjoon: nah

jungshook: oh okay

-

jungshook: we're not hacking today

vtae: ok

jungshook: tae

vtae: hm?

jungshook: nothing never mind

vtae: okay

-

jungshook: when will my husband return from the war?

daddynamjoon: what even?

richeommajin: he's probably bored

daddynamjoon: true

jungshook: look at this stuff

daddynamjoon: ???

jungshook: isn't it neat?

daddynamjoon: jin do something

jungshook: wouldn't you think my collections complete?

richeommajin: aw he's so cute

vtae: are you okay?

jungshook: wouldn't you think im the girl 

jungshook: the girl who has everything?

vtae: somebody stop him

richeommajin: i think he's cute :)

jungshook: look at this trove

jungshook: treasures unfold 

jungshook: how many wonders can one cavern hold

jungshook has been text blocked 

vtae: whoever did that, i love you

richeommajin: he was getting annoyed

vtae: who?

vtae: namjoon? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

richeommajin: why does it matter?

ihavenojams: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

vtae: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

imyourhope: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

vtae: do you even know what we're talking about?

imyourhope: ...

imyourhope: now i do

sugadaddie: ur dumb

daddynamjoon: change your username   
min yoongi!

sugadaddie: no

imyourhope: did you not notice that he changed it?

jungshook: its been three days

daddynamjoon: jin...

richeommajin: namjoon...

imyourhope: yoongi...

sugadaddie: hoseok no

imyourhope: why does everybody hate me 

ihavejams: i don't hate you hoseok :)

daddynamjoon: park jimin...

ihavejams: ...

imyourhope: shut up jimin nobody likes you

ihavenojams: ...

ihavenojams: that's not what you said last night

daddynamjoon: oh

jungshook: i did not need to know that!

richeommajin: park jimin sleep with one eye open tonight

sugadaddie: wait hoseok you're dating jimin??

ihavenojams: i was joking lol

sugadaddie: oh okay

ihavenojams: i would never steal ur crush from u :)

sugadaddie: park jimin!

daddynamjoon: i gtg

ihavenojams: ^

sugadaddie: park jimin come back here right now

richeommajin: he's my only backup!

vtae: i heard a scream

jungshook: i think jimin's getting murdered

richeommajin: taehyung you're my new backup

vtae: i gotchu fam

richeommajin: jungkook you're my new backup

vtae: wowowowow

jungshook: at ur service sir

richeommajin: where is the noise coming from?

jungshook: my room

richeommajin: we're going in

vtae: why does nobody care about me?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> probably exo group chat next chapter


	5. Are You Dumb?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> layixing: what is happening?
> 
> loohan: aw he's finally up from his nap
> 
> layixing: shut up loohand 
> 
> loohan: i liked it better when he was sleeping

richeommasuho: guys im pregnant

jongdayye: you've already had ten children

minseok: when will it end

richeommasuho: do you think i look fat?

fanfan: no you like fine

richeommasuho: fine?

fanfan: oh boy

richeommasuho: i only look fine??

kyungshoe: not to sound rude or anything but why haven't you kicked the old band members out of this group chat?

fanfan: ^

minseok: he's being nice

kingkai: but they left tho

loohan has left the chat

minseok: look what you guys did

loohan was added to the chat

porkchanyolk: you're welcome

loohan: pork chapyolk why

barkkie: who changed my name?

yehet: aw barkkie!

barkkie: delete urself seahoon

loohan: i just noticed ztao never talks

hztttao: oh so its ztao now?

loohan: omg

hztttao: i thought we were friends looham

richeommasuho: why are you guys bullying each other

fanfan: shut up sewhoe

richeommasuho: i suspected this would happen im not dumb yifob

fanfan: oh boy

layixing: what is happening?

loohan: aw he's finally up from his nap

layixing: shut up loohand 

loohan: i liked it better when he was sleeping

layixing: im hungry

loohan: go back to sleep and eat in ur dreams

layixing: ur so dumb omg

loohan: r00d

layixing: i guess i'll make some food now...

baekkie: make me some too

layixing: make your own food

baekkie: get your own bed then

kyungshoe: do i want to know the history behind that

jongdayye: probably not

richeommasuho: do you guys want to eat out?

layixing: yay food

fanfan: i thought he meant something else...

richeommasuho: like what you little perv?

fanfan: nothing!

richeommasuho: im happy you left

fanfan: me too

loohan: wow...

richeommasuho: im meeting you guys outside

fanfan: i think i made him mad...

kyungshoe: are you dumb?


	6. Cup Of Noodle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dabqueen: i have nobody
> 
> dabqueen: im so lonely these days...
> 
> dabking: you have me
> 
> dabqueen: its almost like i can still hear his voice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cup of noodle

dabprince: guys im finally going to do it

dabeomma: ??

dabprince: im finally going to kill myself

dabeomma: shut up kunpimook people actually commit suicide it's not a joke

dabprince: im not happy anymore

dabprince: everything and everyone around me is horrible and its my fault

dabprince: i should have died a long time ago

dabeomma: what the hell is going on

dabmaknae: he just finished the third season of the netflix degrassi 

dabeomma: oh okay

dabeomma: wait who killed theirself?

dabmaknae: maya tried but she lived

dabeomma: oh k

dabprince: would i be a great character in that show?

dabking: no because you can't act

dabprince: you're just jealous my character lived in dream knight 

dabpapi: mine technically did too

dabprince: nobody was talking to you 

dabeomma: be nice

dabjae: i read everything and im still so confused

dabqueen: ^

dabmaknae: bambam wants to be in the spinoff degrassi

dabqueen: ew why?

dabmaknae: ^

dabprince: im trying to take all the acting opportunities i can get birch

dabjae: you guys are weird im going to make cup of noodle

dabqueen: im going to make cup of noodle 

dabjae: shut up nobody was talking to you

dabqueen: you are now

dabjae: does anyone else want cup of noodle?

dabking: i want pad thai

dabeomma: oh no

dabprince: burrchhhhhhhh

dabprince: guys lets go get some!

dabeomma: no

dabprince: that's mean what if im feeling home sick?

dabking: then go home

dabprince: are you dumb?

dabking: probably

dabjae: im still making cup of noodle

dabking: good for you

dabjae: fine you're not getting any then

dabking: im leaving with bam x2 bye

dabprince: bam x2...

dabking: if you don't come out of your room im ditching you

dabprince: !!!

dabjae: i want chicken nuggets actually

dabpapi: i'll take you to get some 

dabjae: omg i love you

dabpapi: it's only because i want chicken nuggets too. yugyeom do you want me to bring back some?

dabmaknae: no im gonna eat youngjae's noodles

dabjae: wowowowowowowowowowow

dabpapi: okay we're leaving now

dabeomma: so it's just you and me now yugyeom

dabmaknae: !!!

dabqueen: im here too...

dabeomma: you should run

dabmaknae: why cant i just eat in peace?

dabqueen: i have nobody

dabqueen: im so lonely these days...

dabking: you have me

dabqueen: its almost like i can still hear his voice

dabking: omg

dabmaknae: mark help!

dabeomma: shut up!

dabqueen: i'll save you yugyeom!!


	7. Let The Maknae Be A Maknae

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dabeomma: bambam's not a fair child now go before i kill you again
> 
> jungshook: "now go before i kill you again." -jinyoung 2k17
> 
> dabeomma: jeon jungkook
> 
> jungshook: !!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have three performance shows the rest of this week fml like they end super late and then i have school the next day so i probably won't be updating this

jungshook: yo yo yo

dabprince: oh no

daddynamjoon: jin...

richeommajin: namjoon...

jungshook: bambam...

dabprince: im not trying to do this with you

jungshook: wowie 

dabeomma: i killed yugyeom

dabjae: finally??

imyourhope: aw yugyeom was the only one i actually liked

dabking: um excuse me 

imyourhope: love that yugyeom

dabking: wow all our conversations meant nothing?

imyourhope: when do we ever talk outside of here??

dabking: ...

imyourhope: ...

sugadaddie: i'll be ur friend jackson

dabking: nice to know that somebody loves me :)

sugadaddie: oh its because im tired of everyone else here

dabking: wowowowowowowow

dabqueen: i don't know if i should feel bad...

dabjae: ^

dabmaknae: i was resurrected

dabeomma: the time i finally kill you you try to become a winchester

dabmaknae: what

dabeomma: what

jungshook: yugyeom winchester

jungshook: so is like yugyeom going to be adam? 

jungshook: he's the youngest

dabeomma: finally yugyeom is where he belongs

dabeomma: suffering in hell

dabmaknae: ._.

dabeomma: no don't cry

dabmaknae: ._.

dabeomma: yugyeom im sorry

dabmaknae: :~:

dabeomma: nononononono

daddynamjoon: me as a father

jungshook: you're already like this to me tho

daddynamjoon: shut up you're adopted

jungshook: ;-;

dabeomma: wow

daddynamjoon: oh no

richeommajin: kim namjoon

daddynamjoon: !!!

richeommajin: i need to talk to you

imyourhope: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

sugadaddie: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

ihavejams: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

dabprince: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

jungshook: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

daddynamjoon: jimin...

ihavejams: ...

ihavenojams: ...

dabprince: why does that always happen?

daddynamjoon: because he thinks he has jams since all my children do

ihavenojams: im ur child

daddynamjoon: ur adopted 

jungshook: i have no jams?

daddynamjoon: you do i was joking about you being adopted

richeommajin: namjoon now

daddynamjoon: fine im coming

imyourhope: oh

sugadaddie: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

imyourhope: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

ihavenojams: be gentle joonie!

dabmaknae: ??

dabeomma: go offline 

dabmaknae: but bambam can stay?

dabmaknae: that's not fair

dabeomma: bambam's not a fair child now go before i kill you again

jungshook: "now go before i kill you again." -jinyoung 2k17

dabeomma: jeon jungkook

jungshook: !!!

dabeomma: ur next

jungshook: jinnnnnnnn

dabking: he's not online

dabking: he must be really busy then

richeommajin: what do you want from me?

jungshook: im about to get murdered

richeommajin: oh well

jungshook: im sorry ^~^

richeommajin: for?

jungshook: interrupting you and namjoon hyung

richeommajin: !!!

dabqueen: exposed!!

jungshook: i walked in

jungshook: it was horrible

jungshook: i just wanted to know about the yoongi and hoseok drama

imyourhope: ...

jungshook: oh

ihavenojams: you're the reason we're disbanding 

jungshook: if you never exposed yoongi we wouldn't be in this situation

ihavenojams: ...

imyourhope: ^

ihavenojams: im sorry i'll just go now

jungshook: he just left the dorm

imyourhope: go after him

jungshook: why

imyourhope: because i said so

jungshook: why don't you go after him

imyourhope: im laying down and you're standing up

sugadaddie: i'll just go after him jeez

dabqueen: i live for bangtan drama

dabmaknae: me too

dabeomma: yugyeom you stayed??

dabmaknae: i just logged back on lol

dabeomma: jaebum...

dabpapi: let the maknae be a maknae

dabjae: 

dabpapi: what did you say

dabjae: i didn't mean to do that lol

richeommajin: okay well we're trying to find jimin bye ily jinyoung <3

dabeomma: ily2 jin <3

dabqueen: he ain't ever like that with me tho

dabjae: he's not like that with any of us shut up mark

dabqueen: i don't deserve this kind of discrimination 

dabjae: yea you do

dabqueen: !!!

dabking: im leaving now bye

dabqueen: you were online??

dabjae: ^

dabeomma: ^

dabmaknae: ^

dabking: i don't deserve this bye

dabpapi: lol


	8. EXO-M Is Getting Back Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jongayye: lets get exo-m back together
> 
> loohan: lets not
> 
> jongayye: lets form our own band then
> 
> zxing: okay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * means in chinese

loohan: is anyone awake?

shoemin: its literally 3am go to bed

loohan: but you're up :))

shoemin: yeah because i forgot to turn on do not disturb

loohan: i thought we had something special

shoemin: when??

loohan: ._.

shoemin: okay...

loohan: we've never been alone this long

shoemin: junmyeon is online

shoemin: and so is yifan

shoemin: aw my parents :)

yifan: shut up ur adopted

richsewhoe: you weren't supposed to tell him

yifan: oh

yifan: haha...

richsewhoe: wu yi fan

loohan: he even added the space

yifan: new phone who dis?

richsewhoe: why did i ever date you?

yifan: tbh why did you?

richsewhoe: 

loohan: kris run

loohan: don't look back

loohan: don't go to china either

loohan: he'll find you there

yifan: !!!

jongayye: exo-m

zxing: stop exo-m is dead

jongayye: gucci is bad

hztttao: kim jongdae

jongayye: roll call ^~^

jongayye: xiumin

shoemin: here ._.

jongayye: luhan

loohan: here :)

jongayye: kris

yifan: hi

jongayye: yixing

zxing: here ^~^

jongayye: ztao

hztttao: .

jongayye: lets get exo-m back together

loohan: lets not

jongayye: lets form our own band then

zxing: okay

loohan: yixing no

hzttao: im okay with that

yifan: i hate you all 

loohan: you love me

loohan: that's why i was the first person you talked to after you left

shoemin: and you talked to me when you left

hzttao: i talked to luhan lol

loohan: same

loohan: i texted myself talking about some stuff and then i ranted to minseok

shoemin: blow it like a flute

loohan: !!!

richsewhoe: xiumin no

shoemin: aren't you coming to the next concert?*

loohan: i'll just see you after it*

shoemin: okay*

jongayye: ...

shoemin: it means nothing honey*

loohan: ...

yifan: this is why you two shouldn't have been talking about this in the gc*

richsewhoe: all this mandarin i don't understand 

richsewhoe: google translate here i come

yifan: minseok is talking about luhan visiting you guys after a concert but luhan said he would just visit minseok privately and jongdae got jealous 

richsewhoe: see and this is why you shouldn't talk to ur ex

yifan: you're talking to me tho

yifan: junmyeon? 

yifan: i can see that you're online

yifan: kim junmyeon...

yifan: ugh whatever

jongayye: we can suffer together yifan

yifan: meet me at the movies

jongayye: okay

richsewhoe: what?

richsewhoe: just?

richsewhoe: happened?

jongayye: jealous?

loohan: you guys are dumb*

jongayye: i know chinese*

shoemin: i hate you all*

jongayye: hyunggggg ily

loohan: 

shoemin: like i said

shoemin: i hate you all


	9. Eomma Chat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dabeomma: being a single parent is hard
> 
> richeommajin: then date somebody
> 
> dabeomma: i don't have any interests in anyone
> 
> richeommajin: mhm
> 
> dabeomma: i don't!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> want followers?

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung 

richeommajin: jinyoungie 

richeommajin: jinyoungieeeeeeeeee

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

richeommajin: jinyoung

dabeomma: yeah?

richeommajin: omg you're actually awake thank god

richeommajin: so um

richeommajin: we found jimin at a bar near our dorm

dabeomma: o

richeommajin: ikr

richeommajin: anyways he's drunk and may have caused a small scene...

dabeomma: he caused a big scene didn't he?

richeommajin: 

richeommajin: yes

richeommajin: and like im pretty sure people recognized us 

richeommajin: so i've been on the allkpop website all night

richeommajin: im so tired

dabeomma: aw poor baby 

richeommajin: and now jimin is clinging onto hoseok and i need to talk to yoongi because he knows but he won't open his door

dabeomma: omg 

richeommajin: and now namjoon disappeared and idk where he went

richeommajin: and im so tired

dabeomma: aw good luck on fixing your family

richeommajin: thanks

richeommajin: nvm namjoon went to the store 

richeommajin: he's back now

dabeomma: good

dabeomma: being a single parent is hard

richeommajin: then date somebody

dabeomma: i don't have any interests in anyone

richeommajin: mhm

dabeomma: i don't!

richeommajin: whatever you say

dabeomma: why don't you believe me?

richeommajin: i doooooooo

dabeomma: k

richeommajin: so how's mark?

dabeomma: he's good i guess

richeommajin: how do you think he is?

dabeomma: good i guess

richeommajin: what's your opinion on him?

dabeomma: he's an amazing human being. i love his voice and i love his dancing and i love him so much and he's so beautiful and perfect i love him. 

richeommajin: "i don't have any interests in anyone"

dabeomma: i'm being sarcastic 

richeommajin: "im being sacastic"

dabeomma: i am!

richeommajin: look if you need to talk about crushes im here

richeommajin: and i'll make sure jimin doesn't know

dabeomma: i don't have a crush

richeommajin: okay 

dabeomma: jin

richeommajin: jinyoung

dabeomma: what do i do?

richeommajin: depends on what you're doing

dabeomma: something

richeommajin: do you like mark?

dabeomma:

richeommajin: jinyoungie

dabeomma: 

richeommajin: aw jinyoungieeeee 

dabeomma: 

richeommajin: say something

dabeomma: .

richeommajin: you're so cute

dabeomma: can i tell you something

richeommajin: aw five words from jinyoung

dabeomma: kim seokjin 

richeommajin: park jinyoung

dabeomma: i know who youngjae likes

richeommajin: everyone does

dabeomma: wat

richeommajin: you know youngjae can't keep any secrets 

dabeomma: tru

richeommajin: it's jaebum right

dabeomma: yes

richeommajin: i knew it!

dabeomma: wat

richeommajin: he didn't tell me

dabeomma: ...

richeommajin: ahahahah

dabeomma: well look at the time i gtg 

richeommajin: wowwwwwwww

dabeomma: no i actually do i have to take a shower before everyone else wakes up

richeommajin: wowwwwwwwww

dabeomma: bai ily <3

richeommajin: 3

dabeomma: wow be like that then

richeommajin: you like mark

dabeomma: and you like namjoon

richeommajin:

dabeomma: that's what i thought

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> check out my page!


	10. Bangtan7 Drama

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sugadaddie: the queen arrives 
> 
> dabprince: preorder flight log: arrival on itunes 
> 
> sugadaddie: i hate you
> 
> dabprince: ._.
> 
> sugadaddie: that does not make you cute

dabprince: so like when are we hacking

sugadaddie: when i figure out how to

dabeomma: how long will that take because im tired of talking to you all

sugadaddie: two weeks?? 

sugadaddie: idk 

imyourhoe: ever since got7 was added yoongi talks a lot more

sugadaddie: no i don't

jungshook: yea u do

imyourhoe: when they leave you'll probably be silent again

dabqueen: "imyourhoe"

imyourhoe: ??

dabqueen: look at ur username

imyourhoe: jimin!

ihavenojams: what?

ihavenojams: oh.

ihavenojams: aha..

ihavenojams: looks like i never changed it back...

imyourhope: got7 if you ever play a gamr with us don't lose

dabmaknae: i wanna play a game

dabmaknae: gamr** sorry autocorrect

imyourhope:  yugyeom i know where your dorm is

dabmaknae: !!!

ihavenojams: everyone is here but mark

dabmaknae: park jimin 

daddynamjoon: jimin shut up and leave the group chat

dabeomma: what happened to mark??

daddynamjoon: nothing

ihavenojams: yeah you shouldn't scroll up

daddynamjoon: jimin!!

dabeomma: oh.

richeommajin: oh

~dabeomma has left the chat~

dabpapi: leave him alone guys

dabjae: poor kid

dabjae: he deserved better

dabpapi: im not done with you youngjae

dabjae: forgot i was exposed too 

dabprince: am i getting exposed now

dabmaknae: you like somebody??

dabmaknae: who??

dabprince: i'll text you

dabmaknae: okay

imyourhope: and there goes got7

dabking: im still here

imyourhope: you were here?

sugadaddie: ^

ihavejams: ^

daddynamjoon: park jimin

ihavejams: ...

ihavenojams: ...

dabking: bye guys

dabking: i hear somebody suffering

dabking: i think its youngjae

ihavenojams: i didn't know jaebum was like that

dabking: same

dabprince: but what's funny is that namjoon didn't get triggered

sugadaddie: everyone knew without jin having to say it

dabprince: 

dabprince: true

sugadaddie: so like i wanna kms

sugadaddie: but nobody will let me

dabqueen: stfu suicide is not a joke

sugadaddie: the queen arrives 

dabprince: preorder flight log: arrival on itunes 

sugadaddie: i hate you

dabprince: ._.

sugadaddie: that does not make you cute

dabmaknae: only me ^~^

sugadaddie: aw so young and innocent 

sugadaddie: must protect

dabprince: i miss strawberry

dabmaknae: shut up you only miss strawberry because they backed you up sometimes 

dabprince: strawberry bullies me 

dabmaknae: strawberry bullies everyone wyd

~dabqueen is typing~

dabprince: o

dabmaknae: dasi run run run

imyourhope: o wow

jungshook: lame

sugadaddie: i've heard worse

dabqueen: ur all dumb

sugadaddie: yea i hate u all

dabqueen: nice to know somebody relates to me 

sugadaddie: :)

dabqueen: :)

imyourhope: he's mine 

imyourhope: git ur own frens

sugadaddie: was i just friend zoned??

imyourhope: oh no

dabprince: and that was the last we've heard from j-hope

~private chat between bambam and mark~

dabprince: how ya feeling?

dabqueen: im fine why?

dabprince: no reason

dabqueen: look don't worry about me

dabqueen: worry about jinyoung

dabqueen: i don't know how he's feeling right now and i don't want him to feel like im ignoring him

dabprince: but you are ignoring him

dabprince: it's more like you're both ignoring each other

dabprince: make the first move

dabqueen: no

dabqueen: you're right but no

dabprince: aish you guys are both idiots in love who happen to be ignoring each other because you're too scared to admit your feeling like the idiots you are *in thai*

dabqueen: wat

dabprince: nothing

dabqueen: okay...

dabprince: i know you will make the first move

dabqueen: i won't

dabprince: i'll be watching you...

dabqueen: ew you weirdo *in chinese*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for not uploading. im thinking of writing a legitimate fanfic what do you think?


	11. Suga hacks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> loohan: me to lol
> 
> jongayye: too**
> 
> loohan: minseok do something
> 
> shoemin: minseok isn't online
> 
> loohan: -_-

sewhoe: why does it say 13 people are in this gc

yifan: who is jongdaepapi

jongayye: nice to know somebody appreciates me

loohan: nobody likes you shut up

jongayye: you're just jealous their username isn't luhanpapi

luhanpapi: hm?

jongayye: s h o o k

loohan: my new best friend

jongdaepapi: hi ^~^

shoemin: how did you get into this gc

jongdaepapi: idk i just saw the notifs on my phone rn

jongout: maybe kyungsoo accidentally added them

kyungshoe: everything isn't my fault you know

kyungshoe: accept ur own mistakes

jongdaepapi: im so confused

loohan: me to lol

jongayye: too**

loohan: minseok do something

shoemin: minseok isn't online

loohan: -_-

jongayye: minseok you have to choose one of us 

shoemin: i chose neither

shoemin: bye uglies ❤️

jongdaepapi: me with mel and jaena

shoemin: who?

jongdaepapi: my best friends 

jongayye: be my friend

jongdaepapi: okay

sewhoe: ooh jongdae is in a secret relationship with *insert name here*

jongdaepapi: andrea

loohan: nice name

jongdaepapi: thanks lol

loohan: are you korean??

jongdaepapi: yeah lol

loohan: cool lol

shoemin: jongdae

jongayye: what do u want

shoemin: im sorry

jongayye: whatever

shoemin: ._.

jongdaepapi: okay well i should probably go now

jongdaepapi: bye 

loohan: have a great life

sewhoe: sleep well

jongayye: do good in school

yifan: bye

sewhoe: wow she'll know you for saying just bye

sewhoe: r00d 

yifan: im going to bed

sewhoe: bye

jongayye: ^

loohan: ^

shoemin: ^

yifan: i hate you all

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what even is this


	12. Suga is awake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dabking: they were having a moment wow
> 
> dabqueen: what in gaynation
> 
> daddynamjoon: ^
> 
> imyourhope: what in i deserve more appreciation 
> 
> dabqueen: omg
> 
> sugadaddie: what in hibernation

sugadaddie: hey guys

dabmaknae: im confused

dabmaknae: he texted first what does this mean

daddynamjoon: ^

sugadaddie: just stopping by to say hi

sugadaddie: andtosayihadasucessfulhacktestrunonexo

dabprince: WHAT HAPPENED??

sugadaddie: so i used my username i chose and they were like who the hell is this and stuff 

sugadaddie: hold up i have screenshots 

sugadaddie: *sent an image*

sugadaddie: *sent an image*

sugadaddie: *sent an image*

dabking: im mad that luhan was trying to have a conversation with you

dabmaknae: ^

sugadaddie: why is nobody online when i finally figure out how to hack?

sugadaddie: like we can hack soon if y'all want

imyourhope: do u really want to hack?

sugadaddie: they were nice 

sugadaddie: why not?

imyourhope: what if they were being super nice while calling the police to track you down?

sugadaddie: i didn't think of that...

imyourhope: see i always have to protect you

sugadaddie: i guess so...

imyourhope: idiot

sugadaddie: well you're stuck with an idiot like me

dabprince: ahdjfbaksvdksbaksbdkabalab

dabking: bambi no

dabprince: sorry

dabking: they were having a moment wow

dabqueen: what in gaynation

daddynamjoon: ^

imyourhope: what in i deserve more appreciation 

dabqueen: omg

sugadaddie: what in hibernation

richeommajin: lets hack rn

richeommajin: mark can tell everyone else to make another account

sugadaddie: yayayayayay

imyourhope: i can't wait

dabqueen: we all made an acc

sugadaddie: okay lets do it

dabqueen: im so excited

dabmaknae: i get to meet my dads

dabqueen: oh

dabqueen: yugyeom wtf

dabmaknae: idk

sugadaddie: :)

sugadaddie: lets hack now

imyourhope: im not done wait

sugadaddie: :/

imyourhope: okay now i am

sugadaddie: i'll just slowly add ppl

richeommajin: do that


	13. The Chapter Everyone wants

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> loohan: "gottaluhan" im-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> basically the chapter that explains more about this got deleted and basically got7 and bangtan said they were gonna improv their situation as fan accounts lol

sewhoe: why is the group chat suddenly so big??

yifan: who r u guys?

loohan: hey my friend from last time is here

jongdaepapi: hai :)

zxing: henlo

sewhoe: somebody here has my old username

richeommasuho: do you want it back?

sewhoe: nah

yifan: how did you guys even get added in here?

ohsehun: idk

yehet: ...

ohsehun: oh

loohan: i've never laughed so hard in my life

gottaluhan: mel

ohsehun: wat

loohan: "gottaluhan" im-

jongayye: WHO THE HELL IS STANJONGDADDY

stanjongdaddy: im-

lumybias: im dying rn allayna

stanjongdaddy: shut up jaena

loohan: lumybias

lumybias: oh

jongdaepapi: papi

jongayye: yes?

jongdaepapi: omg

jongout: im actually online for once wth is happening?

loohan: we were hacked into

loohan: this is actually fun tho

kyungshoe: why is this happening

jongdaepapi: why not

loohan: yea i agree with my new best friend

jongdaepapi: oh

stangot7: why am i even in this

stangot7: wait is this exo??

sewhoe: no...

kimminsock: jaena why am i here

lumybias: ask andrea

jongdaepapi: why is everything always my fault

gottaluhan: because things usually are

kimminsock: ^

galaxyifan: ^

stanjongdaddy: ^

stanbts: ^

loohan: stop attacking my bff 

jongdaepapi: thanks dood

stanbyunbaekhyun: what in andrea discrimination 

jongdaepapi: sndnskabsjsnakesnall

gottaluhan: "jsnake"

gottaluhan: triggered

jongdaepapi: i love jhoe

stanvtae: im-

standaddykim: wait when was i added to this

stanvtae: mary!

sewhoe: are any of you korean fans

jongdaepapi: the majority of us are

stanjongdaddy: don't forget the forigners squad

papisewhoe: ^

kimminsock: ^

sewhoe: thats cool

stanbyunbaekhyun: im leaving bye

sewhoe: right as she said that the people in this group chat dropped so hard

jongdaepapi: im still here

loohan: yay my best friend

jongdaepapi: but i gotta go in a little bit because i gotta sleep for my test

jongdaepapi: it's already 3am

jongdaepapi: i wake up at 5am

loohan: remember to eat well and get plenty of sleep

stanbts: andrea i'm leaving now

jongdaepapi: i guess i'll go now

loohan: bye

jongdaepapi: bai

sewhoe: everyone else just left

yifan: what the hell just happened

sewhoe: idk but it was fun

jongout: i mean i guess so

yehet: they took my username...

sewhoe: somebody took mine too but i could care less

yehet: i want it back

sewhoe: why didn't you just ask?

yehet: ...

sewhoe: idiot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stan monsta x


End file.
